No Joy?

First, a clarification: Top Gun is not -- repeat not -- my favorite movie. And I'm pretty sure it's not Sparky's favorite movie either. But for whatever reason, Sparky and I just can't stop talking about it.

But don't worry; if there is any danger in talking about Top Gun too much, Sparky and I were only hurting ourselves today. (Madd Dogg, who strongly discourages us from talking about Top Gun, is still on vacation; Mumbles was absent on his approved "telework" day; and Wheezy got a ride home with someone else.)

Today's Top Gun discussion raised two important questions: (1) What is a "hard deck," and (2) what does it mean to call "no joy?" (For those who haven't seen the movie, or who haven't seen it enough times to memorize it, those phrases are used during and after a mock dogfight between Maverick and Jester. During the dogfight, Maverick flies below the so-called "hard deck" to shoot down Jester. Afterward, Viper reprimands Maverick for going below the hard deck because Jester had called "no joy.")

Today, Sparky explained his theories about what both terms mean. He thinks that the "hard deck" is an artificial altitude below which the Top Gun pilots are not supposed to fly for safety reasons. He believes that "no joy" is something that a pilot announces if he or she can no longer see another aircraft.

Well, according to the good people at "The Tailhook Association," who have a somewhat official-looking website (www.tailhook.org), Sparky is absolutely right! The Tailhook Association tells us that a "hard deck" is, as Sparky guessed, "An established minimum altitude for training engagements." They also note that "no joy" means "Failure to make visual sighting."

Way to go, Sparky. I'll be your "wingman" anytime.