Freud, Part Two

Many of you may remember that, not too long ago, I went all "Freudian" on the members of the carpool (see Tell me about your coffee . . ., August 2, 2006). My thesis was that a careful observer (e.g., myself) could tell a whole lot about someone from what they put in (or didn't put in) their coffee. I think I was pretty much right-on with my analyses of Sparky, Mumbles, and myself.

But today, I learned that Madd Dogg's beverage psychoses need to be re-analyzed. Allow me to explain:

By the time Madd Dogg arrived at the carpool meeting place today (it was just her and I in the carpool), I noticed that she had already finished her tea. "Hmm," I thought. "Very interesting." You may recall that I earlier opined that Madd Dogg drinks tea because of her need to be different and -- although she will object -- fancy. Because it is decidedly un-fancy to slurp tea, I thought it strange that she already had consumed hers. Putting on my Freud specs, I sat back and waited.

After we arrived in the city where we work, something else strange happened. Madd Dogg swerved into the Dutch Bros. Coffee drive-thru and (gasp!) bought a cup of coffee (regular, black). Now as every true analyst must, I refrained from offering any judgments about this at the time. Instead, I watched her suck down that coffee and I waited. I didn't have to wait too terribly long.

Later in the morning, I went to Madd Dogg's office to see how she was doing. Well, let me just say, it was lucky that she wasn't down at the bus mall because I think she would have been arrested on suspicion of amphetamine use. Her eyes were zooming from place to place. Her speech was rapid. She was, in short, a woman on the edge.

By late afternoon, she was barely recognizable. She self-reported to me that while listening to a news story on the radio about a man named Harry Mitchell, she kept picturing his name as Hairy Mitchell. Although I was not there to see it, she apparently laughed herself silly. She later told me that she thought she suffered from Uncontrollable Laughter Disorder (or ULD).

Yes, Madd Dogg, in my opinion you do have ULD, associated with your consumption of coffee. The good news is that it your ULD is entirely manageable. Just stick to tea.